Through A Stranger’s Eyes

food for thought

Perspective. It’s something that seems so incredibly easy to attain, yet we always find ourselves struggling to really, truly gain it. We feel that fighting fire with fire with someone will make them see the world the way we see it. It will make them understand us. The way we think. The way we feel. What makes us smile, what makes us laugh. What makes us cry, what makes us happy. Perspective will allow us to see the light in each other’s eyes and we’ll all be existing with this sincere, mutual understanding of each other full of appreciation, respect, and empathy, no matter our pasts.

In a perfect world, that would be ideal. In a perfect world, everyone would get along. We wouldn’t judge each other or disrespect each other. We wouldn’t intentionally want to hurt others who have hurt us just because we want them to feel our pain. We would all exist with a complete and mutual understanding of each other. No judgment. No hatred. No more fighting fire with fire.

But…wait, this isn’t a perfect world, is it? It’s a world full of perfectly imperfect people who are so quick to fight fire with fire. So incredibly quick to criticize and judge, yet so slow to even attempt to understand. Far too quick to speak and certainly too slow to listen.

I think that sometimes it’s difficult to try and view yourself and your struggles through the eyes of someone else. Just like its hard to see other people with their struggles and attempt to understand it all for yourself. I’m guilty of this. I think we all are, but I think it takes an incredibly strong person to take a step back and re-evaluate their own lives in order to figure out what they can do to better themselves. Not everyone is capable of doing such a thing. So, if you’re one of the rare people who can do so, then consider yourself very lucky. I know I do.

With that being said…have you ever wondered what it would be like if you could meet yourself from a stranger’s perspective? What would be your first impression? Would you like you? Would you find certain things about yourself that you love? What about things that maybe you’d like to change? Would you sit there and criticize yourself for how you look or what you say? What about what you wear? Would you want to get to know you? Or would you quickly turn your shoulder and look the other way? Would you run as fast as you could from yourself? Or would you be willing to give yourself a chance to learn a little bit more?

This is something that I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. I know it may seem weird, but I think it’s a good tool to use to re-evaluate yourself and every aspect of your life. We could all use a little fine-tuning every now and then, don’t you think? So when you use this “let me see myself from a stranger’s point of view” tool, you really get a chance to dig real deep and do some serious soul searching. You give yourself the opportunity to see yourself from someone else’s perspective. They may think that you’re just flat out beautiful and perfect in every way possible. Hopefully, you’ll be able to see yourself this way, as well. Then, you can use what you learn and possibly help others to do the same. Who knows what you’ll find out? Chances are you’ll probably surprise yourself. You may notice a difference in how you react to certain situations. You may realize you need to change your mindset and attitude toward different things. Maybe instead of lashing out when you’re angry, you may realize that you need to tone it down a bit and react in a more civilized manner. Maybe instead of constantly criticizing yourself, you’ll learn to truly love and embrace yourself. Once you get in tune and in love with yourself, then maybe you’ll be able to view others differently with an open mind and a kind heart. Maybe you’ll be able to see the good in them, and you’ll seek to understand them. You’ll want to accept them for exactly who they are. You won’t want to change them or force them to change themselves for you.

Because the truth about life is this: we all just want to love and to have someone to love us back. We all just want to be treated by others how we would treat them. We all just want to be accepted for who we are. We all just want to be truly and blissfully happy.

So why on earth do we constantly do everything in our power to fight all of those amazing things? Because we’re human, and we all have our own ways of coping with things. Some of us are scared. Maybe too scared to face our fears. Some of us are perfectly content with the lives we’re living, and possibly incapable of believing that life could offer us something more. I think the thing that scares us the most is the fact that we’re so afraid and intimidated by the things that we don’t understand. And that is where we need to become a little bit more brave. The sooner we understand that we won’t always see eye to eye with everyone we meet, the better off we’ll be. But, we also need to be okay with the fact that our opinions won’t always be right. Our arguments won’t always be valid. Our truths won’t always be the real truth. We need to accept the fact that people won’t always see the world from our eyes. But maybe, just maybe, that acceptance is the key to perspective. The key to that sincere, mutual understanding of each other full of appreciation, respect, and empathy.

Maybe I’m too much of an optimist for thinking that this could actually happen. I tend to be a very wishful thinker. But, I do believe that we all deserve a chance to be respected and appreciated for exactly who we are.

We all deserve to be understood. We all deserve to be loved.

And, well…that’s really all that matters.

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Embrace

Wow, it sure has been awhile since I wrote anything on here. I have been one super busy girl with no signs of slowing down! But I had a little downtime to write a little something, and I figured it’s worth sharing, so here it is…

It’s funny how life works out sometimes, isn’t it? One day, you wake up and find yourself dealing with things you never thought you’d ever have to deal with. It makes you angry, sad, frustrated, confused…and eventually truly grateful. Out of every burden comes a blessing in disguise. Something greater and bigger than you ever could have imagined. And you may not be there yet, but you will be. All good things take time. You may not be exactly where you planned to be, but you are exactly where you are meant to be. Thank God for that and embrace it. Trust in Him that the greatest things in your life are yet to come.

There is always a silver lining. Always.

It’s just up to you whether you choose to see it or not. So I encourage you to wake up with a smile on your face and happiness in your heart every day. I know it may be tough at times, but just think about what a difference you could make in someone’s life if you choose to smile instead of frown, if you choose to laugh instead of cry. Choose happiness over sadness and anger. Choose compliments over criticism and love over hate. I promise you it will make such a huge difference in your life.

Life’s way too short to be anything but happy. So ask yourself this: if you were to leave this world tomorrow, how would you want to be remembered by others?

Keep that in mind and strive to be the best version of yourself every single day. Always remember to treat others the way you want to be treated. Also remember to embrace your life for exactly how it is and enjoy every second of it. Live in the moment and make unforgettable memories. For one day you’ll look back on your life and think “it sure has been one hell of a ride, but it was truly worth every single second.”

Make your life so beautiful that it’ll be worth remembering.

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Overcoming The Enemy

began to love myself

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you feel completely lost and alone? Almost like you’re screaming so loud for help but no one can hear you? You feel like you’re dying on the inside, but appear completely silent on the outside because you give off absolutely no evidence that something could be wrong. You hide it all behind a smile. Sometimes, you feel like no one cares, and that’s evident when you see people you know clearly going about their life like everything is fine, and you’re just stuck at a complete standstill and can’t figure out why you aren’t okay. However, when you take a step back and really look at the big picture, you realize that you aren’t alone. You realize that everyone goes through their own struggles time and time again, and we’re all just trying to do our best to figure out how to navigate through the crazy curveballs life can throw at us. Oftentimes, we find ourselves being the culprits of our own sadness and misery, and that’s exactly when we need to face our own worst enemy within us.

You see I’ve spent much of my life feeling like I wasn’t okay. Feeling so alone with all of my complex emotions, and not being able to figure out how to overcome them. It’s in those moments that I would really beat myself up. I would say all of these bad things to myself. I would cut myself down constantly. I would judge myself for how I looked and felt. I’d criticize myself for all of the decisions that I made. I would convince myself that that miserable person was who I was and all I’d ever be. I allowed all of that negativity to just break me down completely. And let me just tell you, it was downright exhausting. I hated every second of it. That’s exactly why I’ve decided, from this day forward, to stop doing that to myself. I’ve realized that I need to stop all those negative voices in my head because I let them hold me back. I let those voices overcome me with fear, and I always let them win. I always let them control me.

So, I’ve decided to stop being my own worst enemy.

I think as human beings, we’re genetically inclined to be judgmental, especially when it comes to ourselves. We tell ourselves that we’re not smart enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, nice enough…the list could go on and on. Why do we do this? Why do we always feel like we’re in competition with one another? Why do we always cut ourselves down instead of embracing ourselves for exactly who we are? It’s ridiculous, if you really think about it. We spend SO much time and energy being envious of other people and wanting their lives that we forget to take a step back and look at all that we do have right in front of us. You have your family, your friends, your health, your job, a roof over your head, yet you tell yourself that it still isn’t enough. You still want more, even though you know that there are people in this world who aren’t fortunate enough to have all of those things. You may remind yourself of this sometimes, but you don’t fully take it into consideration. You just find a way to make it about yourself again. But why?

…Because you’re still trying to fulfill a void in your life that can’t be filled in the way you are seeking it. The truth is that when you start being grateful for your life and all of the amazing things in it, you’ll quickly realize that that is enough. That is all the fulfillment you’ll ever need.

It starts with that one realization right there. That realization that you really do have everything you need and more. Be grateful for that. Then, take the next step and turn off all those negative voices in your head. Seriously, you just need to tell those voices to shut up. They don’t control you, and they certainly don’t deserve another ounce of your precious time or energy. Replace those negative voices in your head with positive ones. Instead of telling yourself “I can’t do this,” tell yourself “you know what? I can do this and I’m going to prove that to myself right now because I’m worth it.”

The fact of the matter is that the only person you need to focus on impressing and loving in your life is YOU!

Because honestly, how can you expect to build strong bonds and relationships with other people in your life if you can’t even love yourself first? The only way anything else in life will work out is if you’re truly in love with who you are as a person, and you accept yourself for all of the imperfect flaws that you possess. Without those flaws, you wouldn’t be the person you are today. You also need to believe in yourself, no matter what, and if you feel like you’re not happy with yourself, then you really need to dig deep within and figure out why that is and what you can do to change it and make it better.

It is SO incredibly important that you know your self worth. Take pride in all that you’ve accomplished in life. Forgive yourself for all of the mistakes you made and know that you will make more as life goes on. People make mistakes everyday, but it’s okay. We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t. Love yourself unconditionally. Love your family and your friends. Laugh at the little things and shake off whatever negativity you may face.

Make yourself your biggest fan and you’ll stop being your own worst enemy.